Cerne Abbas

It was my dad who first took me to see the Cerne Abbas giant sometime in the '80s. Apparently pagans are appalled by the introduction of an advert for the Simpsons movie in the field alongside, daubed in biodegradable paint, wearing Y-fronts and wielding a doughnut in response to the giant's club.

While appreciating pagans' broad respect for nature and the turning of the year, I can't get too inflamed about the desecration. Firstly, the graffitists used a temporary medium to daub the field; secondly the Giant's 'ancient' (Iron Age) credentials are seriously suspect. The Giant isn't recorded before the 16th C and reports from the 1760's mention a navel now obscured by his flagrant and improbable erection. Thus the Giant may not be as ancient as assumed, and may have been Culture-Busted along the way.

This brings me back to the bathroom upgrade. Now that I'm serious about this, I'm asking around for recommended firms. My mum has disrecommended one local firm on the experience of her colleague, when the firm's apprentices drew a huge cock and balls on the bathroom wall during the renovation. It was later covered by tiles, but couldn't be misremembered by the colleague, who had two teenage daughters in the house. After bitter complaints she received a set of towels in compensation.