ionetics

Unreliable and possibly off-topic

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Monday, September 19, 2005

Imperfect but good-enough parenting

Wrote a recently rare email to Yasmin Alibhai-Brown of the Independent today when she joined the trivial and overblown tabloid outrage at allegations that Kate Moss has sniffed cocaine and engaged in sexual activity with more than one person of more than one gender at a time. And, shock horror, she may have indulged in these activities even after she became mother to her 2 yr old daughter, even if there's no implication her daughter was exposed or witness to either.

Well knock me down with a feather. Yasmin goes on to revel in a Catch-22 of accusations against inadequate celebrity parenting, condemning Kate Moss both for daring to enjoy herself in victimless offenses (recreational drugs or sex) while away from her daughter, and/or by entrusting her daughter's care to others when she wishes to work or to play.

This really pissed me off, and at first I wondered why I reacted so. Later, while chatting to my Mum I was to realise that the cause was a guilty subconscience, when it struck me that that my daughter's 9th birthday was not next Monday as I'd believed, but today. This may well be an example of poor parenting as judged by Yasmin, and a subject for immediate intervention from Social Services as she recommends for Kate. However, I'd argue it was still 'good-enough' parenting, because I've managed to shop for and wrap her presents, buy a cake and decorations and cook her favourite dinner in 1 hour flat. And only my Mum and I will know how close a call on bad-parenting this was.